The saddest part

That part when I took a deep breath and held it in my chest, muttering the deafening silence

That part when I made just another excuse for your hurtful comment and your heartless decision 

That part when I try to reason, try to see the absolute best in you, try to see things from your perspective 

That part when I bend my heart and make myself believe we aren't worth it, I am not worth it - the effort to hold on to

- I explain to others enough I almost start to believe in what I have been lying to myself
(so it hurts less, so its cut isn't too deep, so my weak smile can fool some naive eyes)

That was the most painful part of holding on to you.