.: another DBSK related post :.
On a very annoyed side of me: I am having exams. Half the battles already fought, half more to fight, the line of loss and won is not clearly defined - which makes me glad in a sense, 'cuz there are still rooms for improvement, hope prevails. Sometime, I do feel lost and desperate toward my situation, a sense of helplessness. Why must the Math paper be so unbearably difficult? Even B range students (B in IJC for Math is no way easy, speaking the truth) leave 25 mark BLANK. What is the point of giving us paper which only serves to frighten and dishearten the majority? Yet Ning's most recent entry struck me with THE epiphany, along with this particular clip I saw online today... Another DBSK post, and more to come, so if you really don't like reading stuff about them, I wonder why you are still reading my blog... I am not born to please.
.: The very meaning of "work hard" on the invisible side of victory and fame :.
How can DBSK be where they are now? Did they just wake up one morning and YES, they are the top idols, top top voices of the East? Did they shed no tear nor sweat and climb up to the very peak of their fame, making legend, living history?
... Fans ponder (if they even care enough to ponder) ... But Cassies know.
CASSIES KNOW the very victory that DBSK win (the hearts, minds and souls of all the fans + Cassies), the very position that they have in all the Music chart... are not just talents...but hard work. PURE HARD WORK, which in many painful ways, eats their private life alive.
SM can force them into merciless schedule, slave contract; but without passion and the sincere earnest to improve their skills, the willingness and desire to let audiences see a better side of them... I do not believe they could have reached this far. K-Pop is a merciless industry. Fans come and go, with the slightest mistakes, even from the past of your childish self (I promise I won't go ON and ON and ON about Jaebeom's painful incident anymore) you can be kicked out of the industry. I think it would be ok for those who are singing/dancing/performing for the cash and the branded clothes... But it is excruciatingly painful for people who are working so hard because of their passion.
Must I name DBSK again?
I think not.
I have listened to them singing in 2006, good, but nothing too special. I have seen them dancing in 2006, good, but not that remarkable. I have very low tolerance toward the flippancy of boybands, rooting from the ridiculous pride of a music classic player. I was speechless in 2009. The perfect harmony of "love in the ice" took my breath away. I understand not a single word. Translation is a bonus, not a must in music. Like the first time I heard Tegar, I felt the unbearable pain within. . . Behind those angelic voice, behind all those perfect dance and smiles for Cassies, this is their reality:
Fame, victory, happiness do not come easy... Years and depressing years in Japan, unable to communicate, frustration, loss in translation, that is just the very brief summary of what stood behind all their awards, maybe this is the reason why they are ever thankful, they are ever humble when it comes to accepting those trophy? Money hard earned is always appreciated by the owner, no matter how much. My father's word struck me with the realization of DBSK's working attitude. Because they never depend on their already famous position in Korea to conquer the Japanese Music industry, because they always try new concept, starting with nothing, starting from sketch, this may be the reason why DBSK always think of themselves as rookies... as newcomers, as someone who must must work hard in order to achieve a greater height.
People, shallow-minded people, I have to condemn them with this harsh comment, many people including the V.I.P - Big Bang's fans laughed at DBSK and said: it took DBSK years to perform in Dome while Big Bang merely debut in Japan and they are going to be there within months... People do forget, I know Big Bang does not, for their victory is also because of their VERY hard work too, that without DBSK, who brought awareness to the Korean music industry, it would not be THIS easy for SS501, Big Bang or any new group to be easily recognized by the Japanese audience.
DBSK seriously is the pioneer thus they are the only group whose fame came from sketch... Something I really admire, and grateful, cuz these years of hard work without immediate payback shape their personality and working attitude uptil now.
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I am thankful I am their Cassie
For from now on, whatever I do, even in failure, I remind myself again: HARD WORK... Of how much I have to go through just to be where I am now. Try harder, work harder...Like Yunho always says: I must show a hardworking side of me. He values hard-work so much, there was a point I thought... he was obsessed. Am I going to give up? I have gone this far? I never thought I could remain in Singapore after the past 4 depressing years
I had the thought of returning home, when I received my Prelim result. For an SCGS scholar, 20 points was a total disgrace. My raw score was 20, after the mercy moderation, I could get into IJC art: 17 points, shattering my dream of joining the AC family. Pressed on, and with HARD WORK, O-level returned with half the score, Have you ever tasted bitter tears of victory? Of those months and days enduring acquaintances' mock? I stayed in IJ, taking 4 H2. Starting from sketch... learning Literature and History ALL OVER again, for the first time... Getting continuous D and below... I am not able to write 6 pages long of small writing essay, able to produce sample essays JUST like this, without these two years of HARD WORK... of writing again and again, of chasing after Mr. Yeo and Miss Lin begging for consultations...
Today, I almost fainted during Lit exam. The heat was killing me. But today, I did not give up. I am proud I did not. I bit my lips till it nearly bleed to stay awake, stay sane. Surely the paper is something I truly enjoy. Being able to sit for the paper, even when I have to wear mask for the last 3 tests, I still feel the bliss. I NEED my exam, and I WANT to do them well. I am not just proving to my form teacher that, though I am physically not fit for A-level, it does not mean my determination cannot make up for my weakness. . .
HARD WORK.
Half of the paper done and tomorrow, another 6 hours of 7 essays, 3 literature and 4 International History... Sometime, in the middle of exam... I feel light, not high. Like I could just fly up like feather... my mind would love to wonder to another world where I could actually enjoy the fruit of my hard work in a more bearable manner... I weigh myself down, most of the time... Gravity... Most of the time, I think of INSA... longing to be able to say the very final INSA this coming December...
I came, not by force... but I will stay and fight till the very end, by choice...
Truly... do you know, this is what I feel all this long?
시간에 지쳐도 사랑에 아파도
그시간 조차 추억이고
마지막 인사를 하네요
사랑합니다 사랑합니다
If I passed out tomorrow, pray not, if I am not able to fully finish my essays tomorrow, I just want to make sure, I do my best, with the very meaning of WORK HARD, something, more than words, DBSK have successfully taught me.
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.: ummm, sms from unsaved number :.
fair enough, I am glad it is a mistake. I am more than just glad because it shows we mutually do not have any lingering feeling toward one another anymore ^^ . My bad! By now, I hope my phone number has been deleted, so in the future, there will be no such thing as a careless mistake/ misdirected sms or anything similar. Appreciate that. Let's end it here, and now.
