if a day is started with Cassiopeia/BigEast love, it can never go wrong...

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Dedicated to my T-List girls, I am back
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You have been travelling alone at the age of 14, through UK, Italy, Thailand... you name it. You have had outstanding days - living in the priest dorm in Vatican, walking in the rain in Bath hands in hands with your crush, talking to perfect strangers who seemed to be your soul mate...Just so you would not start to beat around the bush, you remind yourself that you should like to make this statement loud and clear: "there have been a lot of amazing days in my travelling life - but I dare say, not that many, or indeed barely ANY could beat THIS day of ours (with my Ferina and JinSol. It all started with Cassiopeia/BigEast love... and life proves me right, a day started so glorious, would NEVER go wrong..."


Bear with yourself, my love - for going through your dirty laundry list is really not your niche. You have scrutinized your own blog from the very first entry - just so you had to quit writing recently because you could never be the kind of bloggers who goes like: "Oh, today I meet S. chat with G. go shopping with A. and OH MY GOD, we bought this and that from brand X Y Z -.-" No not me not I. However such a wonderful day like today, you believe "love is contagious. I must share and pass this happiness forward..." that's why you went on twitter, announced your sudden comeback to the blogger world with your ultimate close friends online.  So here you go:

So let's start at 7:03. When the alarm started to "shout like an ehhhh ohhhhh" (Cassie joke), and because you could barely stand that particular song, you opened your eyes to finish the final project. Being outstandingly (and shockingly) productive, you were able to leave the dorm nest in Dankook University at 10 in your ultimate favorite dress... and never would you ever imagine, happiness could simply start with 3 words...

magical words

"I miss you"

... does it ring a bell?

"I miss you"

Perhaps it does not, to others, because in this plain and soundless font, it's meaningless. But imagine a tune... a beautiful tune that captured your heart for the past 3 years with odd; the particular tune that made your heart skip thousand beats whenever you heard it over the radio, in a shop or somewhere near Korean town; that tune that depicts your ultimate feeling with the only band you ever call yourself fan of...

You are right. Hell-to-the-yeah, you are bloody RIGHT, and you knew it immediately. The six Japanese girls who were walking in a group behind your back as you were rushing to the bus station were Tohoshinki's fans. Simply by listening to those 3 words, you could tell, that was Tohoshinki's "Miss You" - that MUST be. And instead of smiling goofily to yourself, you turned around and ask: "Isn't it Tohoshinki's song? Are you BigEast?"

That was JUST enough for them to scream their hearts out in joy. And the rest was history. You talked and talked just like that time you found the lady who owned a CD shop in Kangnam, who went to Yonsei University, married and still displayed the Hall of Honor for DB5K in her shop... You talked and talked and one of the girl asked you who your bias was, which you replied with Yunho - immedi-freaking-ately she pulled out her purse, took out a BigEast limited picture of Yunho and Changmin and handed it you as a gift. You talked and talked and were told that: "Really? Not a lot of people talk about DB5K anymore here? We still love DB5K a lot and many of us are waiting for their comeback, as 5 of course" and you were breathless...

... and you realized you had become weary of the news, the drama, the boys themselves - to be fcking honest. You have been proud of yourself for not being a blind fan since day1 - for that you could clearly state that Heading to the Ground by your bias Yunho was a poor excuse of buying attention from the poor excuse of a script writer and the broadcasting company. For that you have been sick of J.Y.J new songs and albums because you know it best: these boys are talented ballad singer/song writers - but for the sake of topping chart, they are relishing dance songs to maintain their presence in the industry (compared to ballad, dance songs usually do much better on chart - name it Gee, RingDingDong, Sorry Sorry, Mirotic...)

... and for a moment, you became honest with yourself - you have been weary of the boys themselves. You no longer maintain that high level of interest in Yunho, Changmin, Jaejoong, Yuchun and Junsu - you skip several news about them, stop staring and adore every freaking picture posted on DBSKnights. But what keep you? What keep you here with them until this moment, 2 years after the law-fcking-suit?

It's no longer the boy - individually or even, you dare say any duo, trio of them. You hate the new music, new songs. You hate soul-searching for the missing voices in every freaking single song. If not for DB5K individually then who? Now you know the answer: it is BigEast and Cassiopeia that keep the faith - keep YOUR faith... The songs have all changed, the boys have grown up callous with groundless scandals and unbearable pressure/injustice but Cassiopeia/BigEast's chant? It's still the same...


And on this day you met a perfect stranger whose only link to you was the love for the five boys you have never interacted in your life, on that day she handed you this beautiful gift of friendship - you believe it must be a message from above: Linhieee, hang on. It's ok to get weary, it's ok to be disheartened. It's ok that the fire of the torch you promise to hold on for them - like the sparkle of the light house so that them 5 can return "home" home as DB5K in the storm is weak! You are NOT alone, there will be 800 000+170 000 +++ Cassie here to fuel your fire. We are in this together, just for them...

You smiled brightly. The T-bus card you thought you forgot in the dorm suddenly appeared in your bag, next to your iTouch. You happened to visit Gyeongbok Palace right at the moment the guard-change ceremony took place. You were given a JYJ Nature Republic free gift by chance. You visited Bukchin Hanok Village and lost breath by its beauty. You had a wholehearted delicious dinner with your best friend and MakKoLi. You did not sleep on the bus as usual and happened to catch the Jaejoong advertisement on Lotter Duty Free building when the bus passed by MyongDong (support JJ's Protect the Boss ad). You talked to strangers on the bus, had a great time and came back just to hear HoMin's Back to Tomorrow:

A solitary flower, pure in bloom in a tree, so fragile but proud 
Looking at you full of youthful zest, tears are beginning to overflow 
Let’s walk the long road, once again from the beginning 
Tomorrow should shine　BACK BACK BACK now, please BACK BACK BACK with me 
Should surely shine again　BACK BACK BACK together BACK BACK BACK with you

A day started with Cassiopeia/BigEast love would never go wrong... They call it coincidental - you know it's sign and it's fate. You tell yourself: screw the rest - stans and whatnot. Realistically - as a level headed Business major chick, you know it - DB5K would never go back as 5 as long as the butthurt SM is still involved. But this is why we call it faith, when everything is impossible there is still faith - and for faith, you tell yourself: let's just take it one day at a time. They maybe back after serving the army? They maybe back a year from now? OR right this December... it doesn't matter. They will be back and for you... that's just far enough.

...

had a wonderful day! and will go on having more wonderful days under the Rising Sun

How much I can love you

"Fan-girls are someone who cry for you, but move on to marry another man. That's how much they can love you"

- Drama "You are beautiful", 2009 - 

How much can I love you?

I wonder, how much can I care?

How much can my concern matter? 

While, I can't even be there?

I should not play the "victim" game - blaming the situation: "I am an iCassie, that's why I don't know much and can't do much for DBSK" I am really not that kind... Nor am I the kind of person who does not think in opposing arguments, weigh the pros and cons before giving my judgement. Why am I explaining myself at this moment in time, when it's not even me to apologize for my action.

I understand very well, there is NO point bringing the mood down, NO point updating depressing news, no point talking about sad stories/ law suit, cuz guess what? EVERY one there knows all craps that are going on. EVERY one updates the news from different sources, and EVERY one is hurt - in one way or another. EVERY one suffers, enough from external pressure (other fan clubs, other critics) But i just can't come laughing along and pretending I don't know, i did not read news.  I really just can't "let's not talk about it" and watch old clips to make myself temporarily feel better.

'Cuz guess what, even when we do NOT talk about it, it's still the truth, it's still there - the mess, the lawsuit, the suspension. 

But what's the point of talking about it? There is nothing we can do anyway. Join a petition? Join a project? Vote for DBSK? Twit till I drop? What else can I do? All of Meowen have been sad, hurt, their hearts ache, and they really do NOT need another depressed person to come over and remind them of their tragedy. 

It's this feeling that I hate the most... helplessness that I canNOT do anything significant, to solve my own heartache, not to mention easing theirs. It has been more than half a year since I came to CR. I came because of DBSK, but I stay because of Meowen. Many times I ask myself why do I keep coming back? I am not, by any means, that lonely to stay at home and stick with the computer. Meowens aren't just Cassie to me. There are times, I look at them and view them as friends - because some of them were for me when I hit rock bottom. Myra was there, Iva was there when my grandmother passed away. And That Meant The World To Me - I'll never forget that.

But I don't want to be loved for who I am not - a cheerful fan girl, an obsessed one who drool over DBSK hot pix? - no offence to those who are, cuz they are just as adorable. BUT That is just not me. That's never me. I can't just coat myself sugar while I am indeed bitter inside out. What should I do now? I was taught: it's better to be absent than making your presence a mood-spoiler. Till I am able to sort my heads out... I won't go around and bring others down.

It isn't about "how much can I love then" but rather "how much am I willing to love them"

I am sorry, I really cannot laugh for you.

_____________________________

My-Linh's reply on DBSKnights.net translation of YH's father's comment on the lawsuit, "inspired by some fans' suggestion to the admin to clear the post.

"I don't think it's appropriate for the admin to remove this article for the sake of some fans.

True enough, I am also deeply devastated thx to this news. However, removing - depriving the other Cassies from knowing what the people - I don't dare call him an "insider" here - who probably knows more than we do, talk about the situation - is truly inappropriate.

DBSKnights is our trusted source of news because they report, share what's said, what's true, what's going on with DBSK

If this news does not please some fans, then they just have to grow up and deal with it. I am not happy, you are not happy, no Cassie can jump around with this news. But before bashing anyone, we should here from both sides - and apparently this is the opinion of the person who brought Yunho to life. 

So I thank DBSKnights for this news. I am really upset, but I will go and deal with it myself, rather than siding with anyone and bring down the other party.

Without this news, many of us will continue the false hope that YH and CM will join the other 3. Don't you want to see the situation for what it is NOT for what we all want it to be?"

________________________________________________

all said and more will be exposed in the future

now that I am very lost yet refuse to take side - whatever

now that I am trying t pull myself forward, without knowing how

here next to JJ, I will be found

waiting for YH, CM, JS, YC - DBSK

from this moment, till eternity

- whoever are fated, will find their paths crossed - no matter what, this is one thing I believe in - and I am damn sure, they are truly destined to be the fated 5

AKTF

This is the note I wrote under the latest chapter of my fic: A chance of sunshine_chap7. Never mind the fic ^^, however the message below is something I really want to share with you guys. Always keep the faith

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Dearest reader(s),

Thank you for your support to this fic so far, though most of the time, I look at it and wonder if this is a mere fan-girl's obsession with DBSK eps. U-Know. Still I write on, not knowing how many of you out there who are actually following this fic - it's not the number that counts.

it's the faith

Today fan-dom was shattered. Some died a little too much inside, some could not face the truth - some cry - some ... I do not know, we face a whole lot of different emotions. This only proves one thing, DBSK is love, DBSK plays too much of an important role in our hearts.

Having said so, I have read such negative fb status today. "Not all gods create miracle. Farewell DBSK" and I was deeply hurt. IF THEY DO NOT CREATE MIRACLES, THEN WHO DOES? Look at us, look at our lives, look at those moments- thanks to them we survive. When my grandmother passed away, if not for Holding back the tears, Kiss shita mama goodbye, I don't think I could have made it through that flight back from Singapore to Vietnam. When I was l discouraged, there was Bolero, Rising sun, there was Tomorrow will come. For a simple suspension in Japan, how could fan turn away so fast? They were suspended as a group in Korea last year... it's just time, seriously, SM creeps their hands into Avex's part of the responsibility. Until the lawsuit is finalized, it's only necessary that their group activities paused - so the whole law suit things can be in full swing

Never mind my interpretation. Never mind if you think I am making excuse, creating false hope to hang on. Having said that, I believe some will leave fandom very soon. Many of my readers - my assumption that there are actually readers, will have a vague guess that this fic will end here, sooner or later.

But guess what? I am not a fan-girl. I stand behind their back and with many other true red blooded Cassie, form this system of support to DBSK - now and forever, as 1 DBSK and as 5 individual members. 

So as long as I still breath, as long as there is still internet on the land I stand, still electricity for me to plug my laptop - this I promise you, this fic will not die a premature death, the same fate goes to my secret plan for a full 5 DBSK boys novels. Changmin's Evergreen will come next after A chance of sunshine. I never want to say something before things are pretty much done. But for this moment, I will utter my plan out loud - so there is no way I can loose this fighting spirit, take back my words and turn my back against something/ someone I believe in so much.

I say enough, and I will talk no more. For while I am talking senseless, I know Yunho is working hard, JJ is getting drunk, Changmin is watch porn (jk) - I do think he is busy with the drama and school work, Yuchun is expecting his new sit com and of course Junsu is preparing for the Untitled single. None of them stop working.None of them stop trying to do their best for great public appearance - so we do not have to miss them so much. SO I don't want to loose out to them. I don't want to look at their success and achievement and AWWWWWW or WOOOOWWW about it. As much as DBSK makes Cass proud, it's only fair, we keep faith and support them - in turn make them proud for who we are - their extremely mature and dignified fandom.

So take care, everyone. If you are a student, ACE your exams. If you are a nurse, be KIND to your patients. If you are a dreamer, ACHIEVE your goals. Whoever you are, if you have ever called yourself their Cassie, make them proud. For bloody hell, they freaking deserve our trust.


Your Writer,
Linhieee

from Changmin to Changmin

T/N: NeverEnd is Changmin's fanclub.

NeverEnd: This was revealed on 7 February during Changmin's birthday party; a letter written by Changmin to himself. Many thanks to Sarah who wrote it down to share with us and showed us Changmin's gradual growth. Below is the complete letter.

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To Shim Changmin:

You always wish to have a modest appearance. Although it can be said to be a postive aspect of you, but on the other hand, there are times when you show a complete opposite side, so there are often times when you worry about yourself... but recently, I've started to have the mindset of appreciating myself and to be proud of myself, so it can be considered a really lucky thing.

Although in the past, it was exactly as what everyone said: I used to live while looking inward and constantly stressing out, making it harder for myself... but in future, I want to have more faith in myself and live my life like that... Didn't I have the misguided thinking that I was born without a choice on who my parents would be? So, work harder!

Even though I said before: The old me faced many different choices, but the present and future me, will still have many choices that I have to face. In future, no matter what I encounter, no matter who I have to stand before, I want to do the right thing and make the correct choice like I have done so far. Also, as long as I can become a person who stands firm with the right choices I make, that would be good. Of course, I might feel tired because of these choices and I might encounter many difficult things... but if that is the price I have to pay in making the right choice, even if I have to accept punishment, I will break through all these difficulties and ultimately receive wisdom and knowledge.

I think this attitude I have towards life is something I learned from my parents. Although I still have to learn to face up to reality, but no matter how difficult it is, if I cannot make a right choice then I'll have to shake off those options decisively, and from that, become a wiser, more knowledgeable and confident me. In future, won't there be choices that will make me become like that? Haven't I become an artist now? To be an artist as an occupation... Although I've been an artist for a few years, even though there are still many things that I don't fully understand, but I still show my candid side when I appear in front of everyone. There's also a side of me that even I don't know about; aren't there times where I also have to show a side of myself that is not me?

To be honest, this is not something that I dreamed about when I was a child... Who I am now... I often have this thought... "If I'm not doing what I'm doing now, what else can I do? Would I have become a son that constantly causes his parents to worry?" The things that I am doing now may not make people feel exceptionally proud or seem fulfilling. However, don't I still pass each day happily, looking forward to a better tomorrow?

It allowed me to see a beautiful world that I didn't know about and awakened the person that I am now... Teacher Lee Soo Man... SM Family still holds the same gratitude in our hearts, so never change^^ If you are still the person that you are now, the heartfelt gratitude we have towards you will never change...

Now I'm also in my twenties... Compared to others who are of the same age, I had to start working a little earlier and I didn't get to experience the things that they went through... But isn't there a saying, "you gain something when you lose something", this phrase is not said without reason. I always do my utmost best to fulfil my responsibilities to try and carve an even better future for myself. I want to expand further, so let me continue to better myself.

When I think of that I will do everything passionately... even though there are many people in the world who look at me enviously... Instead of always trying to hide from these prying eyes, I think I should do things that are honest to what I really feel and to have a youth which is filled with passionate love when I date someone! Even though it's not an easy task and there might be failures... but I can experience the feelings and passion that belong to my age... I don't want to miss a thing. I think this is a way to make me work harder to become even more passionate... Even if I fail, I still think this way... Career and love... Like what I said before, I don't want to miss out on anything anymore... But, if I make a mistake when it comes to relationships, it will become even more dangerous...

In order to have better judgement, I will make decisive choices with a judgement that is as sharp as a blade. I will become a youth that is even more passionate and hardworking than others... I'll work hard to be even more passionate and rational...

Let's always work hard...

From Shim Changmin
January 2010


Source: [baidutvxq]
Translation credits: mandasoh@tohosomnia.net
Shared by: tohosomnia.net
Do not remove/add on any credits

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When Fans say: "Marry me!" Yunho will reply: "Yes, for sure, come to me". JaeJoong and Yuchun would somewhat give the similar answer but Changmin, Changmin would not.


"No. I don't even know who you are"


And that's is the reason why I have so much respect for Changmin.


While other artists try their best to please fan, Changmin tries as hard to be true to himself despite the hardship in the entertainment industry. It was a tough trade - but he made his choice. Changmin may have the least number of fans among members of DBSK but certainly for those who loves him, they love the true Changmin - not the doll crafted by SM. 


Changmin rarely sees the need to explain himself - why he does things the way he does. However, Changmin is one artist I respect very much. What he thinks of his life, how he lives it, and what he did miss now he no longer want to sacrifice his all for the sake of an idol image... I believe in him, no matter what they say.

for a child who is brought up well, who is rational and thoughtful - would not do anything despicable, against his morality. Bash him, all that you can, but I am too sorry for you - because I believe you are just afraid of the possibility, that he is doing the right thing, making the right choice - which he refuses to explain or apologize - which you refuse to see it in a different light.

Truly wish him another year of success, another year of experiences - all of which he deserves, and deserves more than anyone else

[One shot] Wrong Number - HAPPY BIRTHDAY YUNHO

Wrong Number

“You’ve got the wrong number” – that was Yunho’s first lesson at SM. It was applied to all – all means all age groups: young or old, not too young and not too old; all genders: male or female, even anything in between; all including even his parents – during busy days, his best non-member friends – during concerts. “You make contact with necessary people, at necessary time” – like a broken tape, this warning had been repeated again and again ever since the first moment he signed the contract, sealed his fate. . . For a particularly obvious reason, it became his allergy. Yunho could feel his stomach well up, churning acid fluid all the way from his tummy through his throat. Sometime he could hold the urge to vomit, spit it out this whole hypocrite craps about stardom – that “sometime” only made sense when there was JaeJoong and his understanding eyes, Changmin and his light rebellious smirk, Junsu and his innocent face, Yuchun and his dry laugh somewhere behind his back. However it was not now because all of them weren’t here. Yunho threw up pure acid, on the grand party of his birthday, in SM.

“You’ve got the wrong number” – that was what Yunho was taught/ trained/ made/ forced to say. Maybe after 6 years of knowing too well what SM could do to harm people he loved, Yunho formed a bad/ basic/ immediate reaction whenever his phone received a “wrong” number. Wrong in the eyes of WHAT? WHO? And WHY?  - he no longer cared. End of the day, as long as Junsu could reach out for his dream and performed the musical without any restriction, Changmin could give his all in the next coming drama – without being sued, JaeJoong could have sometime to break away, soul searching for inspiration without the chain around his neck, Yuchun could spend more time with his dogs and family without constant nags … He was very very willing to reject a call from 3 numbers he memorized by heart. “Who’s that, Yunho?” His manger would ask with scrutinizing eyes and he would shrug his shoulders – like an actor, and shake his head – like a pro saying politely, short and sweet: “Wrong numbers, huyng”. Wrong numbers? Wrong his ass! Each of these numbers that connected together to create the three combination of link between his and the other partners’ line was music to his ears. Since he could not dial – he could not prank call, just to hear their voice – he could not do anything with them without harming the owners, he whispered them like his own melody. His secret code, his assurance, his tiny bit of faith left hanging; that as long as the other end of the line would catch his S.O.S connection any time any day when all these craps are over… He would be very very willing to suffer, in silence.

9 p.m. and the bloody SM party for the ASIAN best boy band’s leader was not over yet. There were, of course flowers, cakes and beauty – guys and girls, talents from every field of the entertainment industry. He simply felt those happy birthday songs – though sung by professional singers, those greetings – from sunbae and dongseng were pure cacophony. They held no weight because they did not come from the heart. His mind trailed back to the depressing days – now he would call them the golden days of his youth: somewhere in the past, somewhere in an unknown apartment in Japan, in a cheap corner near dance studio, he was celebrating his birthday with Junsu and JaeJoong, then came Changmin and Yuchun. They did not have shit, not three level birthday cake – since when SM cared? – not even enough food for dinner – JaeJoong’s signature ramen defined delicious. He would trade all these craps – even that something expensive from that tiny little box branded Lee Soo Man’s special attention. For. Just. The. Presence. Of. His. Members.

That’s all.

At 11.30 when all hope almost shattered. He came back to the dorm in perfect loneliness. Changmin and his silence protect and the fact that he was losing weight as fast as Yuchun losing hairs on his forehead were depressing him to the core.

-                   - Yunho, happy birthday. – that was the very first time Changmin opened his mouth since the past… months out of his will.

They stood together in almost pitch dark, eyes on eyes, and Yunho suddenly found the strength to walk over and give Changmin a bear hug.

--                       - Thanks, bro. Are you sure you are doing fine?

-              - Not really, but I am sending a clear message to them-whom-I-would-not-bother-to-name. – Changmin smiled weakly – Huyng, you keep flipping your phone, checking it every moment today. What’s up?

-                          -  … nothing much – Yunho smiled back – I was just waiting for a miracle.

-                           -  I believe it will come, Yunnie. You deserve every bit of it.

And just like that, the 1.86m tall – going 1.90 something model’s eyes sparked like the shining Cassiopeia, before he retreated to his own room. Between the five of them and especially Changmina and Yunho, there were always gaps between words… silence understanding… non written principles of undeniable love. Just with that tiny spark in his brother’s eyes, Yunho knew one thing for sure, Changmin knew exactly what Yunho was. for.

That’s just enough.

11.59.40 pm, his phone rang its heart out a familiar tune… “Wasurenaide” And Yunho – from the bathroom, with lighting speed sprint out to the living room, naked to catch the birthday message from the very very, yes, very very very “wrong number”

“.:*Happy birthday, my lovely Yunnie ^^*:.! May happiness J, love <3 and success*** find you – wherever SM is hiding you from us. May this horrendous period of separation not break us apart but reminds us how precious our togetherness is. May all bashes and despicable lies not creep their filthy hands into our hearts but strengthen us and our trust in one another. May all those take-away food make you treasure my beautiful signature taste – cheapskate ramen ^o^ - don’t you dare skip meals, ok? With all my love <3 and theirs :x ”

Without looking at the number, simple counting those idiotic/ absurdly cute emocon, Yunho mouthed the name of the sender with all tenderness and longing. This number was not registered in his contact list – so indeed it was clearly a very very wrong number.  However as Yunho stood naked in the living room smiling like an idiot, while Changmin stared blankly at you-know-what before screaming his unique “mirotic” scream, Yunho and of course Changmin knew one thing for sure…

It wasn’t a wrong number. It was, indeed, a very very right combination of 9 characters. And to hell with all SM’s craps, Yunho finally smiled wholeheartedly on his very very 25^th birthday.

Hope till the end.

DBSK - only Human

and here in your eyes, I'd like to stay

My monologue:
I am very busy - I still keep track with DBSK. I read too much, feel too much but rarely have the time to pen down my thoughts... However I know, If I do not let it out NOW, I might as well BURST. MAMA, and their  latest Stand by you performance- which many criticize them for being unprofessional - yeah WHATEVER

1. I am glad you came

I am really glad JCS came to MAMA, I am not sorry I do not give a damn about others' opinion.
Calling them traitor? Calling them popularity-thirst? Calling them not legitimate to represent DBSK?
I am speechless, BEYOND my tolerance. Can't they see the desperation in Chun's voice? He longed to sing on stage... Can't they see JJ is at the verge of breaking down? Can't they see? Or are they all blinded by the media? By SM and their tactics? If they can't see then I am telling you this JJ screw up the most handsome face of Asia - Chun broke down - BACKSTAGE, ladies and gentlemen, BACKSTAGE, if they freaking ask for your pity, or if they wanted some kind of sympathy or stir up Cassies' anger - They could have shed JUST a drop of tear, could have shamed SM or did something despicable, I am pretty sure, Cassies are damn willing to burn SM down.

BUT THEY STOOD STRONG till the very END as 3, for 5 members, for 1 DBSK, withOUT CODY, BODY GUARD, with un-sponsored suits, with weary and polite smiles and tired frames... How many of you cry for their conditions? How many of you actually care and feel their pain being separated from their identity? Being reduced to mere voices, not singers, muted singers - the agony of being allowed to stand on stage but NOT to talk to your members/brothers or answer questions?

That's DBSK for you.

Please don't hurt them anymore, Please don't doubt them!
No one tells them this yet, I can't directly come up to Chun and beg him to translate to Su - in case Su, with his MARVELOUS and amusing Su-glish misunderstand my good intention:

"JSC, I am glad you came. I am thankful, you came. I am grateful against all odds, against all threats, you came. I am sure, if there was one freaking reason why you risk your future to step on stage that particular day, it was for US, for CASSIES" - I am just very glad you came

Really if you can't make up your mind and abide your word: "Keep the faith", just move fandom. Faith is not denial, we are all well aware of the situation. We don't deny they are going through much, even anger within themselves toward one another perhaps, but faith... HOPE DIES LAST remember that. That if you chose to believe in their friendship for years, have some faith that even if they fight - as ALL of us have been there,done it, wanted to murder our best friends just so one day ended up crying in each others' arms saying one simple word: SORRY

2. Friendship

Some people started to falter from the very beginning of the lawsuit... some people start  falter now. Some people. NO, I won't deny, MANY people are doubting their friendship.

I don't - even if tomorrow, I see their pictures punching one another, swearing or calling each other's name - I don't doubt their friendship of more than 10 years, 6 out of which they inked themselves, engraved in their heart 4 letter words

TVXQ.

It's true we don't talk with our best friends in primary school anymore, it's true friendship does not stay forever - but it does not mean IT WAS NOT REAL.
At that very particular moment back then in time, they were close like brothers (I am not assuming that they are NOT now) In Paris and somewhere in Prague, in Grand Canyon and all over the places in Japan and Korea, back then they were each others' air to breath, inspiration to compose and motivation to push all that anti's threat and hatred to move on as DBSK.It was truly LOVE, and don't you dare doubt it!

3. Only human

For one last time, I just want to scream my heart out to let those soil-headed people know: even when they are named Gods rising from the East, even when they rewrite history and break all possible record: they are human, with flesh and blood i.e.
1. Your mindless/brain-dead words accusation and doubts/ gossips, whatsoever - I am sure you are damn good at creating chaos, dear SM and antis, DO hurt them emotionally
2. Your poison, in any form, whether it glue or a direct hit on the face, DO hurt them physically and mentally
3. Your constant stalk, camera straight up close to their faces 24/7 drives them INSANE
As much as we love them... we deprive them from the basic rights as human. We can fight with our friends, we can misunderstood our best friends, WHY CAN'T DBSK? Why can't Homin be upset with JCS because they miscommunicate and misunderstand? Why do you take just a moment of their anger to judge their years of hardship and brother hood?
Stand by you performance, Ok, I agree it was not their BEST one. Not being bias or fan-girl, fair enough, it was not their best. But what do you expect? Can you come up on stage, in THAT condition and pull it off better than they do? Common be honest! They are like the little mermaids, dancing their hearts out, beautifully on shattered glasses. So in THAT condition, you want them to smile CHEERFULLY??? You want them to PRETEND that they are fine? Give me a BREAK!, no not me, GIVE THEM A BREAK.
Even when they are DBSK, they are human... Why can't you let them be? They have been trying their VERY VERY best already.
Don't be ridiculous!

4. About JJ

JJ was one of my least favorite members back then, when I first start the whole fan-girling. I am pretty sure, to some of you who know me well, I am not a Yun-Jae lover shipper. I love U Know, simple as that. I rarely talked about JJ before, though those Cassies whom I love the most (namely: Nings and Iva) are both JJ's lovers. But here is something I want to say about JJ
At this particular moment, I would trade almost anything for JJ's genuine smile. I have read many fan's comments, fan's and anti's that JJ cried - what kind of weakness is that? JJ is like a girl, cry baby - real men do not cry...
-laugh, sarcastically LAUGH - Those tears he shed do not make him any LESS of a MAN, but on the very contrary, make him so much MORE like a HUMAN, bloody hell, he is not your freaking ice prince. I appreciate those tears so much because, they simply tell us one thing
---that there is something JJ holds dear to his heart, something JJ lives and fights for, something MEANS THE WORLD to JJ... That beautiful thing is DBSK.
For the first time, I am telling you this, I love and respect JJ - he has the dignity and courage to live true to his emotion and feeling. He is not a freaking coward who hides his heart, being scared of you people calling him a cry baby.
Just for THAT much, JJ is more of a man than any of those antis who call him names

5. Last few words

If one day, all this was to end...would you look back at the time you've spent loving them and supporting them as one you will forever cherish or would you look back and regret???

Fair enough, I thought I would give you my 2 cent, I am giving you my piece of mind worthy of at least $200. If it is still necessary to ask me this question then

NO

Not a moment, a second, a fraction of time will I ever regret loving them, adoring their music, trusting their brotherhood and friendship. Simply NO. fandom and fangirling - these are the things I did not acquaint myself with throughout my childhood and teenage life. Theses are the things I will never get myself into, if not for DBSK

My ritual

1. My Ritual...
The chaos dies down. My heart beats return to the usual speed. From the shattered bits and pieces, I recollect my strength, restore my hope, belief. Faith, I have been talking about it much lately, here and there with people I once called strangers. I wonder how I should address them now, when they have given me too much: too much love, too much care, too much hope and encourangement. I know deep in their hearts, they tremble restlessly at each and every news/ lies/ speculation.

Always keep the faith., Micky tattooed this on his skin... I never love tattoo, never love, never dare bare the pain... Yet the moment I saw it... I was speechless. It was most beautiful, the declaration of love, hope and firm belief rooting from the burning desire for justice. Tattoos are not like birth mark, they were not born as brothers. But tattoo, like "fate mark" it amplifies the love that they cannot put into words, the deafening silence they are holding in their hears. It must have hurt them so much, when people doubt their unity. To members, DBSK is not just a name, it is a part of their hearts, their skin, the symbol of their brotherhood, their friendship, their hardship, blood and tears. Tattoo! Engrave each and every image of years that passed, years to come together. Together, as 5.

I read news everyday, every hour, from different sources, from DBSKnights for information/ facts/ news/ updates, soompi for opinions, Hoahoctro.vn and kenh14.vn just for confirmation... The last two sites are totally unnecessary. They are merely translation of posts I have already read, examined, memorized from DBSKnights, I wonder why I care so much what Vietnamese's newspapers are talking about DBSK. I gain nothing but tremendous annoyance from them: despicable lies, seemingly shocking headlines just to attract readers. It hurts me badly that many Vietnamese readers who are unable to double check the news, will be tricked, will be shattered, will spread bad rumors about DBSK. Again, I send the 3rd and the 4th letter to the last internet site to remind them of what it means being a journalist. It is not about how much click your site gets per day, it is about how reliable the news is. A picture has been taken down by hoahoctro.vn with clarification and apology toward Cassie. But I have not yet heard anything from the other site. I guess to take down the whole post whose bias tone pierce straight into any Cassie's heart is pretty difficult for them. I will fight till the end, for DBSK, for Cassies

I understand fairly well, this is not the end, just the eye of the storm before the messiness of the aftermath takes place. I do wish them well. The only fear is the consequences of the seemingly victory. Will SM play the dirty trick, oppress their talent, neglect the 5th album, prevent them from golden opportunities for talk or live show? Will SM just let it slide, admit their filthiness?

always keeps the faith... With thousands of Cassies in the world, we cling onto each and every word they say, trying hard to interpret the hidden messages in their weary smile... Underneath that sparling bubbly laugh of Junsu, that painful smirk of Changmin, that tattoo of Yoochun, that breathtaking voice of Jae Joong and that calm and composed look of leader Yunho, what do they truly think? feel? hope? fight for? I wish we can shoulder their burden. Quietly, we support them, linking our hands together from worlds apart, Cassies for DBSK

.....................................................
I realize how DBSK fans all the world have touched me. Have moved me to tears by their love and faith. Have made me a better, stronger person: To love deeply like nothing before, fight tooth-and-nail for them against those who would hurt DBSK, to believe and realize that the pain and hardship is essential, so that we can grow as people, so that DBSK can grow, so that their dreams can reach the moon and they'll be determined and strong and worthy enough to do so. That they can show the detractors, the doubters--the world--that they are worthy of everything they ever got.
....
Everyday I feel closer to strangers. Those who I wish I could hold out my hands to and join mine with theirs. Go up to them and hold them. Tell them, thank you, thank you for believing. Thank you for loving. Thank you.

http://users.livejournal.com/_happy_as_rain_/160630.html
........................................................................

I found my blog post recently online while searching for a lyric translation. Three times, three different blogs, one from the USA, one from Singapore, and the last I have not yet identify the location. Cassies are amazing. They don't just read and keep it for themselves, SHARE! Pass it forward on their blogs to cheer one another up from good news to great plans, heartwarming projects. I participate as much as I can, within my ability. I have no idea how far my post has gone to, how many Cassies it has touched. But I am very very glad, and very thankful to all of you, especially to "In Bloom". I am so sorry I have not known your name, or anything much about you... The only thing I am sure, we share common love, for DBSK, for Yunho, for his innocence and true smile... which I wish would remain pure and carefree in years to come

my ritual, my DBSK love, my exhaustion with mugging for A-level and preparing for exams after exams... Even without uttering out a word of complain... I am working hard, harder than ever before...

for faith, belief for a better future prevails, no matter what.

Just to share

NEWS
-NOTE- 11 billion WON is approximately 9 million US dollars. A quick calculation, the members each made approximately USD 360 000 since their debut according to SM Entertainment.

For comparison, the annual income for top Hollywood stars range from everything between USD 10 million to USD 200 million.-NOTE end-

The problem is not how much was given, but how the income was divided... And can only be solved if SM reveals TVXQ's exact income

Amidst the chaos that has ensued after TVXQ members YoungWoong Jaejoong, Micky Yoochun and Xiah Junsu filed a lawsuit against their agency, the rift between the two sides is getting deeper as SM Entertainment revealed it's rebuttal.

There is a lot of talk about SM's official statement and many are skeptical about SM's statement that the amount given to TVXQ was 'a substantial income division.'

On the 3rd, SM released that, "TVXQ, till now (July 2009), have received 11 billion Won (9.2 billion Won given during the activities+1.77 billion Won given beforehand) and have also been given luxury foreign cars (bonuses that don't have any connection to the contract)." SM also said that, "The other side has focused solely on album sales even though TVXQ receive their fair share through events, CFs and other performances."

However, since the exact amount of TVXQ's income till now has not been revealed by SME, SME's statement has been met with skepticism and doubt.

Fans stated, "Even if SM did give TVXQ 11 billion Won, that is still less than 400 million Won per person each year," and "It is not plausible to say that this is enough when the group's immense popularity or influence is calculated," to show their reluctance to accept SM's statement.

In fact,TVXQ's album sales started off with their debut single 'HUG' selling around 195K copies and after eight singles and four albums, they have sold a total of 2,68 million copies in Korea alone.

In Japan, they have released 27 singles and four albums and sold a total of 2.34 million copies. According to the Japanese Record Committee, eight albums, 'Summer Dream', 'T', 'Beautiful You/Thousand Year Love Song', 'Why Did I come to like you? (Doushite)', 'Spell-MIROTIC-', 'Survivor', 'Bolero', and 'Share the World' have received the Gold Ranking (100K or more) and 'The Secret Code' has received the Platinum Ranking (250K or more).

Even when China, Thailand and Hong Kong is not considered, TVXQ has sold more than 5 million copies in Korea and Japan alone. Oricon Magazine, the official album chart for Japan, stated that in the first half of this year, TVXQ took eighth place in total album sales that earned them a total of 2.5 billion Yen (approximately 33 billion Won).

TVXQ's concerts also boast the best ticketing power and the income their live concerts bring in is probably a massive amount. Around 390K people attended TVXQ's Asia Tours, 530K attended their Japanese Tours and 120K attended their showcases. In their concerts alone, they attracted over 1 million fans around the world.

One fan wrote on their blog, "The most recent concert was their Japan Tour that ended at the Tokyo Dome which attracted 300K people. Even when using the average seat cost of 8000 yen (1 yen=1300 Won), that is still 2.4 billion Yen, in Won that would be 31.2 billion Won."

They also stated, "This is only taking the ticket fee into consideration. When you add up all the souvenirs sold during the concert and add this to the ticket cost, they must have earned at least 50 billion won."

After the Tokyo Dome concert, many Japanese news agencies estimated that, "If you add up all the money TVXQ earns in China, Southern Eastern countries, Korea, etc, TVXQ must earn around 100 billion Won every year."

There are other sources of income such as musical income sources of streaming, background music for homepages, downloads and ringtones, and commercials, performances, DVDs and photobooks, as well as a cartoon character venture, the amount that TVXQ has earned till now is almost out of this world. That is why SM's statement regarding money has become an issue.

In reference to SM's statement that "From their debut till now, we have paid TVXQ 11 billion Won," many fans are saying that, "It's not about the actual amount of money given to them, but the percentage of total income given to them," and "SM is putting forth a large number of 11 billion Won to make it look like they have been giving the members proper treatment pay-wise."

Fans also stated, "If the agency is so convinced that they are being fair and just, why is it that they aren't revealing the exact income of TVXQ? There are too many unclear parts in this contract that even the members did not know the contents of." They also criticized SM Entertainment by stating, "Because of SM's poor attempts at making TVXQ the scapegoat, more questions are arising and they are causing confusion."


Credits:
oh my news + DNBN]
Translation credits: jeeelim5@iscreamshinki.net
Shared by: iscreamshinki.net
Copy from http://dbsknights.blogspot.com


.................................................

Just to share with anyone who is reading my blog. I have been catching up on the news about DBSK for the past few days, none stop as if it is now a part of my daily ritual. I try hard to not become obsessed and emotional with all the news, there are supportive and accusing news, opinions coming from all over the places. I guess, all my fellow Cassies must be exhausted in this horrible rollercoaster by now.

Just want to say a few words of encouragement to all those who have been fighting so hard to support DBSK. I also read news from Vietnamese newspapers and online sources. For once in my life, I broke out of my ignorance, indifferent mode to send the writer of 2 articles emails to let them know their news are biased and proven incorrect. Isn't it my role to play to support my favorite artists? If DBSK are proven wrong at the end of the day, I will accept their mistakes but I cannot just stand there and see many Vietnamese Cassies get tricked by catchy headlines, get hurt by accusation of DBSK.

Pray that the truth will soon be discovered, whatever it is, we have enough of those cover up claims, fake news...

we always keep our faith in DBSK, till the end

동방신기믿어

It's 3.30 in the morning and I am still awake.

I am trying, the sad thing is I am TRYING to finish my work for tomorrow. It has been a bad weekend, nightmarish for me. I don't know how it will end. I told my Cassies all over the world to keep faith. I try to reach out to each and every one of them, any of them, all those I would normally call strangers.I dare not address them as friends yet. Cassies, it is a very beautiful name, this is how I will call them, 800 000+++ Koreans and 170 000+++ Japanese, countless of Thai and Chinese, oh, I shall not forget my dear international Cassies to whom, I belong.

I forbid myself from checking on DBSKnight. I have been obsessed with the website, true enough, I believe they are really THE BEST DBSK's website out there. I admire the fans who set it up. I truly am grateful to you guys who have been working so hard subbing all the Japanese and Korean shows that DBSK participate so that English speaker like me can comprehend, appreciate and fall in love with your idol. Yes, now are are mine too. I embrace my new identity, Cassie, a member of Cassiopeia.

No one understand why we people stay awake up to this hour. They say we have absolutely no life and we are JUST some fan girls who are nuts about SOME singers. Well, "whatever they say", I used to think that way, I have to admit. I really thought of this whole thing as absurdity. So what? They disband? Another band will rise, like after H.O.T, DBSK comes, after them? SHINEe? BIG BANG??? Who cares? I don't even understand the language. Furthermore, isn't this the law of the entertainment industry? The curse of 5 year for SM???

Well, it was the past. I remember trembling listening to Junsu's beautiful voice in "Love in the ice". I remember drying my tears for the final time as "Kiss Shita Mama, Sayonara" plays in the back ground. I remember only "Love Bye Love" could calm me down as I confronted a traumatizing nightmare. I remember, I remember them all, each and every tremble of my heart, each and every shiver that runs through my spine as I learn to appreciate their talent: Micky's, Changmin's, Jejung's, Junsu's and of course, my favorite leader: Yunho's. Their cheerful personalities, their handsome looks, their ... jokes and their brotherhood may have brightened up my days every now and then, but it was their voice, note, it is their VOICE not voiceS which gives me faith, heal my heart and restore my belief.

The unity of their individual voices can be defined as perfection.

it is just pop? You must not have heard them with your hearts to give such comment. You must have heard them with prejudice. I grow un-offended whenever someone laughs as I express my love and admiration for them. Instead, it must be the gift from their music that give me the strength and passion to continue, introduce, convince my friends that well, they are gods rising from the East for a reason. Putu fell in love with "Proud" as she saw real tears of joy rolling down from Micky's and Junsu's eyes. Indora must be tapping her feet along with the long list of DBSK music I flux her Ipod. Spread the love. Let them be known.

I only realize how important they are to me this moment, only when I see with my own eyes, feel with my own heart and soul, with every fiber of my being: how deeply affected I am upon the news of the possibility of their disbandment. FAITH. It is all Cassies have at the moment. There are so many fake good news, so many speculation upon this issue.

Fans may falter... Fans may doubt DBSK
fans NOT CASSIES, for Cassies always keep faith in DBSK. We believe we know them, we believe they love us as much as we love them. For that, Cassies stay strong together.

Have you heard of miracle? created by Cassies?
Midoyo was a hit of DBSK at least 3 years ago. It was back then when the boys just barely debut for a while, rookies you can call them. Don't say good bye is another hit in their 4th Album Mirotic. Cassies in Korea has been listening to them none stop in forums to make sure, these songs, again will make miracle, top the music chart, competing with all the newly released hit. I believe this is not only the work of Cassies, but also V.I.P (rivalry Big Bang's fan club), E.L.F (Super Junior's)... Kpop fans stand together to send a message to DBSK: Midoyo (I believe) in DBSK and please: "Don't say goodbye"
Another miracle: Cassiopeias are getting ‘동방신기믿어’ as 1st on Daum’s search ranking to show that we believe in them." The news was sent ALL over the WORLD this afternoon, and guess what? We succeed. It became number 1, as DBSK is number 1 band in our hearts.

I am going to stop here as I realize I have been typing non stop.

I just want to whisper softly again: 동방신기믿어
Faith, I still hold on to the torch, the red glowing stick in the dark, along with Cassie's red ocean. Please find your way back together as 5 for 동방신기믿어. in DBSK we believe and DBSK alone.

.:always keep the faith, cassiopeia:.

.:always keep the faith, my fellow Cassies:.
in whom? who else but them, DBSK, who else but them? the 5 talented singers we love

.:always keep the faith, my fellow Cassie:.
though I know our hearts are all shattered bits and pieces, and our eyes are all teary at the verge of breaking, confronting this fear that they will no longer be "brothers"
though it is so hard to think straight and decide, who is trying to bring us down by deceiving us, all those lies, and speculation

.:ALWAYS keep the FAITH:.
in NO ONE else but THEM, OUR DBSK
and ONLY in them, we TRUST

These days I believe many of us have gone sleepless and exhaust ourselves, jump for joy then pain our heart just to know some good news are fake. Go and rest, Cassies, and wait for their OFFICIAL response.

As u rest tonight, please keep them in your prayer, as I will in mine.

TRUST in THEM
BELIEVE in THEM
WAIT for THEM

NEVER have them let us down
so please, IF WE DON'T BELIEVE IN THEM ,THEIR FRIENDSHIP, BROTHERHOOD, TALENT, PASSION AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, LOVE FOR US, CASSIES... if we don't trust in them, WHO will?

take care of yourself, they will feel hurt if they know we are hurt by loving them.
I am proud to be one of you guys, my dear Cassiopeia

please take care of yourself.



Lyric translation
Believe, I believe that you can fall in love at first sight
Even though i told you its impossible
I only hid this thought from you because I was afraid that you would look at me as if I was careless and hasty.
To Tell the truth, ever since I met you
I only lived with thoughts of you.
There was only one thing on my mind from when I woke up in the morning to when I went to bed at night.

* I believe in you...I will send all my feelings for you through the the way I look at you.
I want to gather all of my feelings for you and send them away
Do you know that I want to keep the feelings I have for you hidden?
I also fear that you might leave me...
You...

Love is a nervous feeling that flutters your heart...
it is like a breathtaking loneliness...
Please keep looking at me with the same eyes...always and forever like this.

If only you could stay close enough to me
so that my heart can relax...
just so that I could see you...
I would be very happy.

*Repeat "You"

If I could stay by your side like this...
If, in the end, it is that I don't know anything about how much I love you.

*! Repeat

I can't let you go
You are the only one in my life
... dbsk ...

I pray you'll be alright

I pray you'll be alright

....................................................
So it is just a game of the gods- to give and to take
my life, my love, my passion
to give and to take
And TOOK they DID
again and again

I have had enough, but they are asking for more
what now? what else do I have left?Who else do I have left by my side?
... sometime I am scared of my own self, am I a bad luck?
I dare not love too much, I dare not devote myself too much
Names from the past flash back and forth, what have I done?
It was not easy for me to stay sane.

Those I held dearest to my heart, one by one was taken away.
I am exhausted...

what game is this?
must I name who and what they took from me?

.....................................................
again and again, I am left breathless unable to figure out...
this time round...please don't take this away from me...


... I pray you'll be alright...

that you will be able to stand strong, together, as 5.

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