My ritual

1. My Ritual...
The chaos dies down. My heart beats return to the usual speed. From the shattered bits and pieces, I recollect my strength, restore my hope, belief. Faith, I have been talking about it much lately, here and there with people I once called strangers. I wonder how I should address them now, when they have given me too much: too much love, too much care, too much hope and encourangement. I know deep in their hearts, they tremble restlessly at each and every news/ lies/ speculation.

Always keep the faith., Micky tattooed this on his skin... I never love tattoo, never love, never dare bare the pain... Yet the moment I saw it... I was speechless. It was most beautiful, the declaration of love, hope and firm belief rooting from the burning desire for justice. Tattoos are not like birth mark, they were not born as brothers. But tattoo, like "fate mark" it amplifies the love that they cannot put into words, the deafening silence they are holding in their hears. It must have hurt them so much, when people doubt their unity. To members, DBSK is not just a name, it is a part of their hearts, their skin, the symbol of their brotherhood, their friendship, their hardship, blood and tears. Tattoo! Engrave each and every image of years that passed, years to come together. Together, as 5.

I read news everyday, every hour, from different sources, from DBSKnights for information/ facts/ news/ updates, soompi for opinions, Hoahoctro.vn and kenh14.vn just for confirmation... The last two sites are totally unnecessary. They are merely translation of posts I have already read, examined, memorized from DBSKnights, I wonder why I care so much what Vietnamese's newspapers are talking about DBSK. I gain nothing but tremendous annoyance from them: despicable lies, seemingly shocking headlines just to attract readers. It hurts me badly that many Vietnamese readers who are unable to double check the news, will be tricked, will be shattered, will spread bad rumors about DBSK. Again, I send the 3rd and the 4th letter to the last internet site to remind them of what it means being a journalist. It is not about how much click your site gets per day, it is about how reliable the news is. A picture has been taken down by hoahoctro.vn with clarification and apology toward Cassie. But I have not yet heard anything from the other site. I guess to take down the whole post whose bias tone pierce straight into any Cassie's heart is pretty difficult for them. I will fight till the end, for DBSK, for Cassies

I understand fairly well, this is not the end, just the eye of the storm before the messiness of the aftermath takes place. I do wish them well. The only fear is the consequences of the seemingly victory. Will SM play the dirty trick, oppress their talent, neglect the 5th album, prevent them from golden opportunities for talk or live show? Will SM just let it slide, admit their filthiness?

always keeps the faith... With thousands of Cassies in the world, we cling onto each and every word they say, trying hard to interpret the hidden messages in their weary smile... Underneath that sparling bubbly laugh of Junsu, that painful smirk of Changmin, that tattoo of Yoochun, that breathtaking voice of Jae Joong and that calm and composed look of leader Yunho, what do they truly think? feel? hope? fight for? I wish we can shoulder their burden. Quietly, we support them, linking our hands together from worlds apart, Cassies for DBSK

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I realize how DBSK fans all the world have touched me. Have moved me to tears by their love and faith. Have made me a better, stronger person: To love deeply like nothing before, fight tooth-and-nail for them against those who would hurt DBSK, to believe and realize that the pain and hardship is essential, so that we can grow as people, so that DBSK can grow, so that their dreams can reach the moon and they'll be determined and strong and worthy enough to do so. That they can show the detractors, the doubters--the world--that they are worthy of everything they ever got.
....
Everyday I feel closer to strangers. Those who I wish I could hold out my hands to and join mine with theirs. Go up to them and hold them. Tell them, thank you, thank you for believing. Thank you for loving. Thank you.

http://users.livejournal.com/_happy_as_rain_/160630.html
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I found my blog post recently online while searching for a lyric translation. Three times, three different blogs, one from the USA, one from Singapore, and the last I have not yet identify the location. Cassies are amazing. They don't just read and keep it for themselves, SHARE! Pass it forward on their blogs to cheer one another up from good news to great plans, heartwarming projects. I participate as much as I can, within my ability. I have no idea how far my post has gone to, how many Cassies it has touched. But I am very very glad, and very thankful to all of you, especially to "In Bloom". I am so sorry I have not known your name, or anything much about you... The only thing I am sure, we share common love, for DBSK, for Yunho, for his innocence and true smile... which I wish would remain pure and carefree in years to come

my ritual, my DBSK love, my exhaustion with mugging for A-level and preparing for exams after exams... Even without uttering out a word of complain... I am working hard, harder than ever before...

for faith, belief for a better future prevails, no matter what.

Just to share

NEWS
-NOTE- 11 billion WON is approximately 9 million US dollars. A quick calculation, the members each made approximately USD 360 000 since their debut according to SM Entertainment.

For comparison, the annual income for top Hollywood stars range from everything between USD 10 million to USD 200 million.-NOTE end-

The problem is not how much was given, but how the income was divided... And can only be solved if SM reveals TVXQ's exact income

Amidst the chaos that has ensued after TVXQ members YoungWoong Jaejoong, Micky Yoochun and Xiah Junsu filed a lawsuit against their agency, the rift between the two sides is getting deeper as SM Entertainment revealed it's rebuttal.

There is a lot of talk about SM's official statement and many are skeptical about SM's statement that the amount given to TVXQ was 'a substantial income division.'

On the 3rd, SM released that, "TVXQ, till now (July 2009), have received 11 billion Won (9.2 billion Won given during the activities+1.77 billion Won given beforehand) and have also been given luxury foreign cars (bonuses that don't have any connection to the contract)." SM also said that, "The other side has focused solely on album sales even though TVXQ receive their fair share through events, CFs and other performances."

However, since the exact amount of TVXQ's income till now has not been revealed by SME, SME's statement has been met with skepticism and doubt.

Fans stated, "Even if SM did give TVXQ 11 billion Won, that is still less than 400 million Won per person each year," and "It is not plausible to say that this is enough when the group's immense popularity or influence is calculated," to show their reluctance to accept SM's statement.

In fact,TVXQ's album sales started off with their debut single 'HUG' selling around 195K copies and after eight singles and four albums, they have sold a total of 2,68 million copies in Korea alone.

In Japan, they have released 27 singles and four albums and sold a total of 2.34 million copies. According to the Japanese Record Committee, eight albums, 'Summer Dream', 'T', 'Beautiful You/Thousand Year Love Song', 'Why Did I come to like you? (Doushite)', 'Spell-MIROTIC-', 'Survivor', 'Bolero', and 'Share the World' have received the Gold Ranking (100K or more) and 'The Secret Code' has received the Platinum Ranking (250K or more).

Even when China, Thailand and Hong Kong is not considered, TVXQ has sold more than 5 million copies in Korea and Japan alone. Oricon Magazine, the official album chart for Japan, stated that in the first half of this year, TVXQ took eighth place in total album sales that earned them a total of 2.5 billion Yen (approximately 33 billion Won).

TVXQ's concerts also boast the best ticketing power and the income their live concerts bring in is probably a massive amount. Around 390K people attended TVXQ's Asia Tours, 530K attended their Japanese Tours and 120K attended their showcases. In their concerts alone, they attracted over 1 million fans around the world.

One fan wrote on their blog, "The most recent concert was their Japan Tour that ended at the Tokyo Dome which attracted 300K people. Even when using the average seat cost of 8000 yen (1 yen=1300 Won), that is still 2.4 billion Yen, in Won that would be 31.2 billion Won."

They also stated, "This is only taking the ticket fee into consideration. When you add up all the souvenirs sold during the concert and add this to the ticket cost, they must have earned at least 50 billion won."

After the Tokyo Dome concert, many Japanese news agencies estimated that, "If you add up all the money TVXQ earns in China, Southern Eastern countries, Korea, etc, TVXQ must earn around 100 billion Won every year."

There are other sources of income such as musical income sources of streaming, background music for homepages, downloads and ringtones, and commercials, performances, DVDs and photobooks, as well as a cartoon character venture, the amount that TVXQ has earned till now is almost out of this world. That is why SM's statement regarding money has become an issue.

In reference to SM's statement that "From their debut till now, we have paid TVXQ 11 billion Won," many fans are saying that, "It's not about the actual amount of money given to them, but the percentage of total income given to them," and "SM is putting forth a large number of 11 billion Won to make it look like they have been giving the members proper treatment pay-wise."

Fans also stated, "If the agency is so convinced that they are being fair and just, why is it that they aren't revealing the exact income of TVXQ? There are too many unclear parts in this contract that even the members did not know the contents of." They also criticized SM Entertainment by stating, "Because of SM's poor attempts at making TVXQ the scapegoat, more questions are arising and they are causing confusion."


Credits:
oh my news + DNBN]
Translation credits: jeeelim5@iscreamshinki.net
Shared by: iscreamshinki.net
Copy from http://dbsknights.blogspot.com


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Just to share with anyone who is reading my blog. I have been catching up on the news about DBSK for the past few days, none stop as if it is now a part of my daily ritual. I try hard to not become obsessed and emotional with all the news, there are supportive and accusing news, opinions coming from all over the places. I guess, all my fellow Cassies must be exhausted in this horrible rollercoaster by now.

Just want to say a few words of encouragement to all those who have been fighting so hard to support DBSK. I also read news from Vietnamese newspapers and online sources. For once in my life, I broke out of my ignorance, indifferent mode to send the writer of 2 articles emails to let them know their news are biased and proven incorrect. Isn't it my role to play to support my favorite artists? If DBSK are proven wrong at the end of the day, I will accept their mistakes but I cannot just stand there and see many Vietnamese Cassies get tricked by catchy headlines, get hurt by accusation of DBSK.

Pray that the truth will soon be discovered, whatever it is, we have enough of those cover up claims, fake news...

we always keep our faith in DBSK, till the end

동방신기믿어

It's 3.30 in the morning and I am still awake.

I am trying, the sad thing is I am TRYING to finish my work for tomorrow. It has been a bad weekend, nightmarish for me. I don't know how it will end. I told my Cassies all over the world to keep faith. I try to reach out to each and every one of them, any of them, all those I would normally call strangers.I dare not address them as friends yet. Cassies, it is a very beautiful name, this is how I will call them, 800 000+++ Koreans and 170 000+++ Japanese, countless of Thai and Chinese, oh, I shall not forget my dear international Cassies to whom, I belong.

I forbid myself from checking on DBSKnight. I have been obsessed with the website, true enough, I believe they are really THE BEST DBSK's website out there. I admire the fans who set it up. I truly am grateful to you guys who have been working so hard subbing all the Japanese and Korean shows that DBSK participate so that English speaker like me can comprehend, appreciate and fall in love with your idol. Yes, now are are mine too. I embrace my new identity, Cassie, a member of Cassiopeia.

No one understand why we people stay awake up to this hour. They say we have absolutely no life and we are JUST some fan girls who are nuts about SOME singers. Well, "whatever they say", I used to think that way, I have to admit. I really thought of this whole thing as absurdity. So what? They disband? Another band will rise, like after H.O.T, DBSK comes, after them? SHINEe? BIG BANG??? Who cares? I don't even understand the language. Furthermore, isn't this the law of the entertainment industry? The curse of 5 year for SM???

Well, it was the past. I remember trembling listening to Junsu's beautiful voice in "Love in the ice". I remember drying my tears for the final time as "Kiss Shita Mama, Sayonara" plays in the back ground. I remember only "Love Bye Love" could calm me down as I confronted a traumatizing nightmare. I remember, I remember them all, each and every tremble of my heart, each and every shiver that runs through my spine as I learn to appreciate their talent: Micky's, Changmin's, Jejung's, Junsu's and of course, my favorite leader: Yunho's. Their cheerful personalities, their handsome looks, their ... jokes and their brotherhood may have brightened up my days every now and then, but it was their voice, note, it is their VOICE not voiceS which gives me faith, heal my heart and restore my belief.

The unity of their individual voices can be defined as perfection.

it is just pop? You must not have heard them with your hearts to give such comment. You must have heard them with prejudice. I grow un-offended whenever someone laughs as I express my love and admiration for them. Instead, it must be the gift from their music that give me the strength and passion to continue, introduce, convince my friends that well, they are gods rising from the East for a reason. Putu fell in love with "Proud" as she saw real tears of joy rolling down from Micky's and Junsu's eyes. Indora must be tapping her feet along with the long list of DBSK music I flux her Ipod. Spread the love. Let them be known.

I only realize how important they are to me this moment, only when I see with my own eyes, feel with my own heart and soul, with every fiber of my being: how deeply affected I am upon the news of the possibility of their disbandment. FAITH. It is all Cassies have at the moment. There are so many fake good news, so many speculation upon this issue.

Fans may falter... Fans may doubt DBSK
fans NOT CASSIES, for Cassies always keep faith in DBSK. We believe we know them, we believe they love us as much as we love them. For that, Cassies stay strong together.

Have you heard of miracle? created by Cassies?
Midoyo was a hit of DBSK at least 3 years ago. It was back then when the boys just barely debut for a while, rookies you can call them. Don't say good bye is another hit in their 4th Album Mirotic. Cassies in Korea has been listening to them none stop in forums to make sure, these songs, again will make miracle, top the music chart, competing with all the newly released hit. I believe this is not only the work of Cassies, but also V.I.P (rivalry Big Bang's fan club), E.L.F (Super Junior's)... Kpop fans stand together to send a message to DBSK: Midoyo (I believe) in DBSK and please: "Don't say goodbye"
Another miracle: Cassiopeias are getting ‘동방신기믿어’ as 1st on Daum’s search ranking to show that we believe in them." The news was sent ALL over the WORLD this afternoon, and guess what? We succeed. It became number 1, as DBSK is number 1 band in our hearts.

I am going to stop here as I realize I have been typing non stop.

I just want to whisper softly again: 동방신기믿어
Faith, I still hold on to the torch, the red glowing stick in the dark, along with Cassie's red ocean. Please find your way back together as 5 for 동방신기믿어. in DBSK we believe and DBSK alone.

.:always keep the faith, cassiopeia:.

.:always keep the faith, my fellow Cassies:.
in whom? who else but them, DBSK, who else but them? the 5 talented singers we love

.:always keep the faith, my fellow Cassie:.
though I know our hearts are all shattered bits and pieces, and our eyes are all teary at the verge of breaking, confronting this fear that they will no longer be "brothers"
though it is so hard to think straight and decide, who is trying to bring us down by deceiving us, all those lies, and speculation

.:ALWAYS keep the FAITH:.
in NO ONE else but THEM, OUR DBSK
and ONLY in them, we TRUST

These days I believe many of us have gone sleepless and exhaust ourselves, jump for joy then pain our heart just to know some good news are fake. Go and rest, Cassies, and wait for their OFFICIAL response.

As u rest tonight, please keep them in your prayer, as I will in mine.

TRUST in THEM
BELIEVE in THEM
WAIT for THEM

NEVER have them let us down
so please, IF WE DON'T BELIEVE IN THEM ,THEIR FRIENDSHIP, BROTHERHOOD, TALENT, PASSION AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, LOVE FOR US, CASSIES... if we don't trust in them, WHO will?

take care of yourself, they will feel hurt if they know we are hurt by loving them.
I am proud to be one of you guys, my dear Cassiopeia

please take care of yourself.



Lyric translation
Believe, I believe that you can fall in love at first sight
Even though i told you its impossible
I only hid this thought from you because I was afraid that you would look at me as if I was careless and hasty.
To Tell the truth, ever since I met you
I only lived with thoughts of you.
There was only one thing on my mind from when I woke up in the morning to when I went to bed at night.

* I believe in you...I will send all my feelings for you through the the way I look at you.
I want to gather all of my feelings for you and send them away
Do you know that I want to keep the feelings I have for you hidden?
I also fear that you might leave me...
You...

Love is a nervous feeling that flutters your heart...
it is like a breathtaking loneliness...
Please keep looking at me with the same eyes...always and forever like this.

If only you could stay close enough to me
so that my heart can relax...
just so that I could see you...
I would be very happy.

*Repeat "You"

If I could stay by your side like this...
If, in the end, it is that I don't know anything about how much I love you.

*! Repeat

I can't let you go
You are the only one in my life
... dbsk ...

in faith I trust

...I am still waiting for the latest news...
Yet somewhere in the bottom of my heart, there is a voice telling me:
...prepare for the worst...
it is not as if it is the 1st time, no matter how matter I pray, I know it is not going to be the last. . .

Again and again, I am beaten in my own game, yet I have not been able to master the art of accepting fate, still not get myself to be prepared for the worst yet. The worst always comes though... Like an unwanted old acquaintance, knocking on the door. "GO AWAY!" I screamed yet little do I know, fate has the master key to every corner of my heart... Deliberately, without fails, she turns things up side down

So today, I will not just let her in anymore.
WHAT NOW? I will greet with FAITH by my side. I trust in them and trust in their friendship, brotherhood as much as I respect them as artists.



6 years together can be thrown away in a blink? I wonder. They are the best ASIAN band I have known so far. I just came to appreciate their talent recently. This can't be the end.Within that short period of time, I became a true Cassiopeia. I will still be, though, no matter what. cuz by my side more than 800 000 Korean and 170 000 Japanese not to mention countless of international Cassiopeia are praying for their unity and future success in this battle against SM Town. For I believe if they fight, it is not among themselves but they fight for the better treatment of all SM artists, esp. the juniors: Super Juniors, SNSD, SHINEe... After all if there is anyone who can create HISTORY, they MUST be DBSK for they are the legend: Gods rising from the East, They are the one and only group that has that power to make things right.

I have faith in them

I pray you'll be alright

I pray you'll be alright

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So it is just a game of the gods- to give and to take
my life, my love, my passion
to give and to take
And TOOK they DID
again and again

I have had enough, but they are asking for more
what now? what else do I have left?Who else do I have left by my side?
... sometime I am scared of my own self, am I a bad luck?
I dare not love too much, I dare not devote myself too much
Names from the past flash back and forth, what have I done?
It was not easy for me to stay sane.

Those I held dearest to my heart, one by one was taken away.
I am exhausted...

what game is this?
must I name who and what they took from me?

.....................................................
again and again, I am left breathless unable to figure out...
this time round...please don't take this away from me...


... I pray you'll be alright...

that you will be able to stand strong, together, as 5.

<

STRANGE-R

and the last person who saw her teary eyes was a complete stranger

a complete stranger

who knows nothing about her, just another stranger
nothing about the reason why, how come, those big brown eyes were sparkling.
He wanted to ask her something, out of courtesy... curiosity... ?
So he looked into her eyes, with all courage, breathed in

..............................................
I sink into my own imaginary world, the very one that was carved out of the resentment of youth, made-believe tales, freedom and nobility of soul... in another word, madness.

My mp3 player keeps playing the same rock ballad: Thunder, I can't bear to continue hearing Heaven anymore. The violin in the background is just too painful, tearing every bits and pieces that is left unwounded in my heart. Why do I feel this way? I think - I rarely think deep recently - just to make sure I can keep myself sane. back to the point, I think that I am an island. The more he reaches out for me for the comfort of another wounded soul, the more I turn sharp and rude and sarcastic. Must I be this way? I don't think I have to. Just that it is for safety precaution.

I don't want you to sink into me, to intrude my privacy, so I shove "him", the universal address to all the possible attempt, away for he is just nameless being in my alternative reality. Like a land, a castle, a safety nest I hide myself away sometime, for little, or much fantasy. If I don't write out my thoughts, my fictions, if later on in the further road of life I am walking, I cannot become a writer, a novelist; I think I will become a very good liar, I mean, a story teller. Is there such thing? Who knows?

Back to the point, about that land where I feel safe, it is surrounded by a forest. I screamed out in despair: "Don't enter, or else you'll die"

What can I do? In the moment of desperation, he steps in, and stares at me: "What now?" And stabbed I did, wounded him I did, hurt is such a mild word I shall not excuse my crime, I admit them all. One of my female friend heard me over the phone. Thoughtfully she said: "He has a heart too, if you forget" I smiled wearily, I am not that dump, not that stupid, to punch a rock and hurt myself. I am aware of his weakness, his soft side... just to make sure I aim and push him away.


it's for your good
and my sanity


Those who stick around learn a new language: my native tongue. It is my actions that replace my words, filled the deafening silence around me.
1. Putting on my earphone = I really need space/ zone out
2. Glaring = ok, please stop
3. Watery eyes = let me be
4. No response = don't try to press, I am not deaf,I just don't want to talk about it

it's ok, you can be my friend, to care a little and ask not too much about me.
it's ok, you can consider me a best friend even, I will listen, to whatever you say, I care. Just that I don't want to be cared for and I cannot return that purity of soul you pour out. I want not to share the other half, tell my story. What for? I'm leaving, isn't it harder for you? I don't want to start something I have to end

it's ok, perfectly fine you can treat me as a non-gender companion.
but it is NOT ok if you love me, desire to possess me.
'cuz if you love me, you have to love all of my madness, scars and open wounds, misery, erratically obnoxious nature, my over sensitive soul and overwhelming expectation...

...........................................................

And for that, she stares back at him, not in a rude way, just strange, the kind that does not mean to offend you but just to examine your purpose of looking at her. Oh well, what to say, what to expect, she is a "STRANGE-R" from the start.
So he looked away, bad attempt, he mumbled

and she smiled, wearily in triumph, this is bliss, whispered the lonely girl whose loneliness is the result of her inexplicable choice. She sinked in again, drifted to another land with her mp3 still playing the same song like her midnight prayer to those nightmares she faces too often recently.

Thunder, this is not gonna be the soundtrack of her life. She has to snap out! But when and how? When her unconscious mind keeps returning to the same person of the past, "you left me", whispered her, in exhaustion, "why do you keep coming back to me, in my most vulnerable moment?"...

let me be